Saturday, March 04, 2017

Je suis désolée, Monsieur Urban

I took French in my sophomore year of high school and sorry to say I did not learn much.

For one, it was my first class of the day and I was often completely baked with smoking pot with friends on "the patio" which was a small area in the back of the school where smokers could smoke.

I used to think that the girl who was sitting in front of me in French class was giving me the side-eye, which would make me giggle like a maniac - which of course would result in her actually giving me the side-eye, which would make me laugh even more.

La pothead qui rit!

I also smoked cigarettes in those days too, like most of my high school friends.

Henry Urban was my French teacher and I can only assume he is dead by now although I scoured the internet for any proof of this and found none. The only thing I retained from his class is "j'ai aller au toilette" which is basically "I have to go to the bathroom." I asked for this most days I was in class, and it wasn't because of a bladder problem it's because I would have a cigarette in the ladies' bathroom.

In retrospect I think maybe he was fine with me smoking cigarettes in the ladies room since smoking is such a quintessentially French thing to do, especially in those days.

Now, of course, I'm sorry I didn't pay more attention in French class, and am doing my best to make up for lost time. If only Monsieur Urban could hear me now, I would say to him: "Excusez-moi, M. Urban, je voudrais aller au toilette pour fumer des cigarettes."

How proud he would be.