Tuesday, June 26, 2018

OKCupid - getting desperate

I took this photo on the 1 train in Manhattan today - the subway car I was riding in was plastered all over with the OKCupid "DTF" campaign.

The schtick is that the letters don't mean "down to fuck" as per usual.

Instead the letter F stands for things like "Farmers Market" and "Fall in Love."

I think it means women must be leaving OKCupid in droves thanks to men being such assholes. 

There are lots of web sites devoted to the awfulness of men on dating sites. Although it does lead to some funny comebacks from the women.

These idiots have inspired the term "fuckboys" and the phrase "dick is abundant and low value."

OKCupid seems to be admitting the problem here:
The ads are aimed at anyone who wants to bring their full selves to dating. But Hobley says they may resonate especially with women, who are “aware that the phrase DTF was used historically in a negative way. There’s power in taking that back and making it yours.” 
I don't see how any dating site is going to survive on the long run. There are just too many stupid men in the world. Men who think, because it's a dating app, somehow the rules have changed about how you should treat people and in the words of Alana Massey:
...men stormed into our messages with all the social grace of Steve fucking Urkel but none of his endearing sincerity with appeals like, “Sexy dress. Hook up?” They used the precious real estate of their bio to complain about women rather than entice them. They wore jerseys for teams that suck. They attempted to order women to their homes as if they were chicken fingers on Seamless...
They can't change men from being assholes who start conversations with crude inappropriate comments, and there are just so many men who do that. The sheer quantity of awful men saying awful things to women has a cumulative effect.

Even if it's only 10% of the men who are horrible, men send messages often, so most women on dating sites will have to deal with an avalanche of stupid gross comments aimed at them.

And that can wear you down and make you hate men until you decide they are absolutely not worth it and to hell with them all.

Ladies and gentlemen, the men of online dating.