It was good to see you again

It was good to see you again, but I
Will deny that everywhere except here
In this sonnet. I did think I would die
Before we ever met again, but there
You were, suddenly. First I heard your voice,
Unmistakable, but I had to look
Anyway - then away - I had no choice:
I could not bear if you again forsook
Me, and to my face. Long-distance disdain
Hurts enough, and my silly fantasy
Could not withstand reality's old pain:
You will not with open arms beckon me.
The whole universe can the mind conceive,
But one outcome: that you in silence leave.